rejection

I dont know why,Iget so ,defensive,so paronoid,upset,obsessive.I go on this chat,and I think this guy feels,is uncomfortable,with me on.well,we had gotten into a big arguement ,last week ,Iwas
just so sad,hurt,bout what he said,anyway,today on his chat room,he acted ,was not himself ,ignoring me. But was it my mind ,my being paranoid? I am worried ,why did he not answer me?then more upset,more sad,more hurt .its a vicious cycle.I like beg him for forgiveness,and then I think man I have stooped the lowest of lows..I should never beg for people
to forgive me.I shoudnt do it ,but,,,its that damn depression ...
but ,all I want is people to like me.acept me and love me for who I am .I get upset and I relive the conversations over and over,i replay each word..analyze it,,disect it ....find some negative thing..
and ,now i am sad again,now,i am hurt ,why didnt he just tell me ,not talk to me in circles
Tonite ,will be a lonely nite ,and now ,i cry/
rember the love you take is equal to the love you make